Monday, May 2, 2016

Who is really in control?

Have you ever heard yourself say, "get me off this planet"? With all the colors of trouble, pain, foolishness, disease and trouble it is no wonder we entertain this statement. In the same breath we take it back, often because we realize how fleeting life is. If life is fleeting and painful, it is also good. If we say there is no purpose then nothing matters and if we can get caught up in the questions even if for a minute it MUST matter, that is life must have a purpose.

Like a race we all want to finish well requires training, these questions and a host of others come and go in life and require purpose for the asking. We find our answers at times and at others we may never really know. Some answers come much later in life. The seasons are all an instrument of this walk. I believe the seasons are our purpose. We cannot finish well unless we watch where we are going and we cannot watch where we are going with out understanding the signs.

Let's search out some signs, shall we?

Genesis 1
[ The Creation of the World ] In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. The earth was without form and void, and darkness was over the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God was hovering over the face of the waters. And God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light. ...
In the very beginning God was there, and He is there with you and with your struggle or pain or joy whatever it be God IS there. It may seem as a singularly present place but God knows why we need these times. If we can but for a minute focus on Him we will there in Him find our questions answers, resources and therefore purposes.



Just think, as God hovered over the face of the waters, what do you think His reflection looked like? Did He speak the very thing He saw reflecting, "let there be light"? We speak what we see far to often; despair, depression, pain, greed, foolishness, hurt, anger, contempt, distention, bickering, division. We do this for many reasons...sometimes it is an all consuming view. It may be all we know and all we have seen modeled to us. It may just have slowly snuck in on our race and taken over due to disappointments and failures either perceived or real. There is a truth we were meant to listen to that displaces even the darkest of points in our lives. Even in those hard times that do not end, nor will they ever, there can be hope. In his book called, "Autism Breakthrough" by: Raun Kaufman, he says the following about hope, "The bottom line is this: hope leads to action. Without action, none of our children can be helped. I hear people complaining of false hope, but I never hear anyone worrying about false pessimism."

This belief in false hope paralyzes all chance of doing something meaningful, whether related to autistic children or any other area of concern in this life. Hope is meant to be pursued not cast off to the side like an unneeded garment. A friend of mine and I joke about the human condition and that we would all too often take up our "bag lady clothes of the past," the garbage that is unneeded and unbecoming and put it on, gussy ourselves up with these items; past regrets, denials, failures, these things we think worked well but we really know down deep they do not. We just wear them because they are comfy like a nice sweater or sweatpants, we recognize ourselves in them. Why not wear them to own it, right? Why try the same and expect a new result as the saying goes. No, why not try on hope instead, have a hope makeover. Isn't it better to try hope and fail (if it be possible) than to keep the same old attire on that we know looks drab and gives us no light? I would rather wear light in my attitude, heart and mind than to feel the weight and hopelessness that carrying and maintain the old garbage requires. My petition is to change minds to get us to look at what light looks like on, reflected in a life. We are in control of what we wear and what others have to gaze upon.

Finally, I'd like to leave you with Psalm 8 and some closing thoughts about control.
Psalm 8 New International Version (NIV)

Psalm 8[a]

For the director of music. According to gittith.[b] A psalm of David.

Lord, our Lord,
    how majestic is your name in all the earth!
You have set your glory
    in the heavens.
Through the praise of children and infants
    you have established a stronghold against your enemies,
    to silence the foe and the avenger.
When I consider your heavens,
    the work of your fingers,
the moon and the stars,
    which you have set in place,
what is mankind that you are mindful of them,
    human beings that you care for them?[c]
You have made them[d] a little lower than the angels[e]
    and crowned them[f] with glory and honor.
You made them rulers over the works of your hands;
    you put everything under their[g] feet:
all flocks and herds,
    and the animals of the wild,
the birds in the sky,
    and the fish in the sea,
    all that swim the paths of the seas.
Lord, our Lord,
    how majestic is your name in all the earth!   
Notice some interesting things in this Psalm, the Lord uses His name as "majestic in all the earth", and it certainly is! His name is at stake.
Next, He establishes strength against the very enemy through children and babes...innocence conquers the greatest enemy (not harshness, getting even or building walls to protect us from more hurts).
Finally, His creation, made by His fingers, formed with thought and purpose wait for it...
He makes man ruler over it all.
Not only that but over all the living things- we are simply put in charge over them. I have read this for what feels like hundreds of times but never have I heard (thank-you Holy Spirit for speaking so I can hear) before the fact that God gave up control and handed over His very majesty, His heart's work, His creation, His artistry, His business per say...to man- but a breath. We are a little lower than angels in His good way because He placed it all under our feet, entrusted, loved, called.
The God of the universe gave us His business...His successful, beautiful, rich business called creation....He just handed it over. Does anyone else see a struggle as I see in this? God seems to just finesse right past this struggle (of course He's God!). I struggle to let go, daily. I struggle to trust that my kids will do what I said they should without repeating myself multiple times. The conversation goes something like this, pick up your garbage by the chair where you sat today, do your web design project for school and call so and so all before I get home, ok...Did you hear me? I ask them to repeat what I said usually something or 100% is omitted and so this cycle repeats. Then most often I come home and maybe one thing is just being done as I walk in. Can anyone relate?
How daddy God can just hand it all over and trust us so, to follow His instructions is awesome. Wow, is that loving and amazing, isn't it? He doesn't get uptight about us doing it "His way or the highway", He doesn't stare over us and harp on us when we blow it. He is not a control freak. Now I am not saying we shouldn't care how things are done, there is being a good steward with what we are entrusted with and training our children in the way we should go. I am speaking to this release of control that God (who is amazing, astounding and beautiful) just releases...it is so awesome really.

When I fail at something I don't need to hyper-analyze it a million ways to apologize to everything,  yes I mean everything, possible that I blew it 700 ways. I don't need to tie myself to the guilt train tracks and wait for the next over analytic-express to take care of me. I definitely do not need to let my mind rehearse all the ways something could have been better. Do you see where I am going with this? The peace that God let's go and gives is valorous, it is amazing. It melts my heart.
If you are living in a day to day life where it feels like you need the world to stop and give you a break, this message is for you. What shocked me was for my world to stop, as my world stopped everything else I was trying to keep going and keep in the air stopped too. Suddenly people had to pick up for me, this drives me nuts. Even when I know I cannot do it all- I want to, I cannot bear the thought of someone having to deal with my work or stuff. I had too. Simply put, I had to. Crisis called and I had to pick up and in picking up the call other things of importance had to get dropped. In this moment I could have gotten all out of control or thank God He showed me this verse. I need to let go and just see the reflection of His light in the day while I am around to see it. Instead of putting on my old garbage I will walk out in light and trust He has it under control and if not He will help me do what I need when I need to. It is ok to give up some of the beauty, creation and projects in our hands to others- after all they can handle it, don't we believe in them? When someone believes in us is calls us higher.


All Scripture copied from www.BibleGateway.com

Monday, January 18, 2016

Concession Stand Confession



Concession stands, useful for running to when we need to grab a quick snack. Convenient, low cost- umm not really, but considering the circumstances of a need or craving at the time, it fills a need; cravings however are only momentarily suppressed.
 
Some people prevent the cost and sneak things into events to save a buck. My husband worked at the school in our town with his brother and they helped clean up after a football game this year, he was telling me he found whole 6-pack rings in the stadium- wow, someone actually snuck in whole 6-packs; that takes skill, gotta hand it to them.
 
But I was most amazed as he talked about the garbage people left behind. Didn't bother carrying it out of the game with them some mere 30 paces to the garbage can which was located in the direction they needed to head anyway. They just enjoyed the game, walked away and tossed their "unneeded's" where they sat.
 
You know it amazes me people spend $100's to purchase little fitness trackers that track their steps and fitness goals but in the fury of selfishness we humans have a one track mind that won't take the steps needed to dispose of our own garbage, but before I render judgment I had better analyze my own self...let's go on with the rest of the story and I will better explain.
 
 
There was a very high wind that night after the game so when they went to clean up, he took a picture from the top of the bleachers looking over the junk left after the fun, that was blown into one corner of the bleachers. After clean up it would literally fill one whole large garbage can.
 
Someone always has to deal with what we leave behind. 
 Unreal.
 
The concession stand image is what I want to set in your mind as I change the journey now onto us.
 
When does convenience drive us? By definition concession means: a thing that is granted, especially in response to demands; a thing conceded. Concede is an equally interesting word meaning: admitting that something is true or valid after first denying or resisting it and surrendering or yielding.
 
May I submit for our thought that perhaps our behaviors may be driven by our convenience and that convenience saps away at our purpose and compassion. Intentionalism is only created in a heart full of order. An autopilot system in navigation of an airplane is used to control the trajectory of the flight without hands on control. It is not a system that replaces an operator but assists them so that their focus can be on more demanding things such as weather, systems and other operations. Autopilot is a function that should be left to support safety in the air and not switched on in our everyday lives, as a self-preservation system. There are times in our lives we may well need autopilot to make it through but it should be a time of focusing on more demanding things like healing, helping another, focusing on the matter of importance but then more importantly remembering to turn off auto-pilot and not leave it on indefinitely.
 
So today I have a question for you, which side of the concession stand are you on? I believe life's difficulties can lead us to take up multiple posts; inside serving and outside cleaning up, maybe we are even guilty of purchasing conveniences and leaving behind messes for someone else to clean up. So whether the garbage has been piling up and blowing around for you to clean up, or you are lifting up the concession stand window open for business on the outside, set to serve but out of convenience and not passion. Out of "hours of operation" and not really living the dream, or you may even be the one leaving the piles lay, let us discover some reasons to get unstuck.
 
Let's start with taking up shop behind the concession stand, this has been a confession I have to make of myself recently. Demands. I have to confess for me my convenience has become "finishing" amidst heavy demands. The kind that pierce the soul so life runs dry. I open up the internal concession stand in the morning, I get my life in order best I can, I get my son ready for the day, I talk to my family, I go out the door. I switch into concession work mode, I get my work done best I can. Do you serve all day long? Do you open up the window to start the day and sometimes feel like leaving it shut? It is easy for life to become clinical, open the window, put on face, take money, serve others, close up shop, go home, do it all over again. Of course there are many more steps in a day, but for effort of simplifying the story do you know what I am talking about? Maybe it is the stress, the demands, disappointments, discouragements, maybe even hurts so deep that can cause us to become a cold and bitter feeling "worker in life"  mentality. This one develops slowly but in an eerie unfeeling way, such that we do not even know what we've become. God willing, He snaps us awake so we see the joy we are missing in this "motion rolling". Life is not meant to be survived but sometimes great pain makes us believe this. Negative words keep us stuck behind the protective roll down concession stand window of life, negative thoughts, bad treatment, judgment, fear...the like can keep us in a position where we are in control in our brick fortress and we determine the hours we will put up with life and then we can simply "check out," down goes the window, I am done now. This works great for a while, but the problem becomes, we are breakable. We are not superhuman. The concession stand mentality gives us the "denial view" that we are protected and getting things accomplished when in reality we are hiding and running away from something all while running a million miles an hour. Worse yet we do all this so good that we are giving people the wrong perception that we are fine and have it all figured out! We've set an idealistic standard for them in the process. Oh, we look like the one now leaving the garbage for others when all we wanted to do was survive. As much as I am not a feelings person- even people who prefer to be in the mind and not the heart like me- break. So what is the cure for the concession mentality? An active admission that this is not working, an active agreement with yourself to again participate with more that stepping through life out of survival. Why? Why you ask is this even important or why should we care? If there be any sense of meaning in this life, it matters what we do. We still are behind a counter of life- we still are serving others in some capacity whether we admit it or not. We count. Like it or not. We influence. We matter. If that is truth then what? Then what do we want to stand for...we have a choice but we also have a calling. We are called to be salt and light and move from glory to glory, not motion to motion. Christ designed the body which represents many, many lives. Any and all who call Christ Lord and savior are member's of His body. He designs the body the way He wants and He calls it glorious, pure and beautiful. He does not call it dead, tired and poor. We need to seek His vision for life and success. The Bible says life is in the blood, blood we have flowing through our veins and also covering us, shed for us to live abundantly. The problem is there are many things that can block blood flow. Blockages in our literal body can cause tissue damage, amputation and as we know blood flow interruptions in a vital area such as the carotid artery can cause brain damage, strokes and permanent impairments to speech and normal body function. We were never meant to have blood flow interruptions. May I set out before you that working the concession window is cutting off blood flow and living off of what we alone have. The first question I had to ask myself was why in this area of my life (that I had started going through the motions) did I have a blockage of the blood of Christ covering all and being all to me. My answer was in getting an answer I had not bargained for. I had been thinking I was to go one direction and when that direction came open I was disappointed in myself to see it was not the way. I was not sure who I was and this what I thought I wanted but it turned out not to be what it was. Instead of being changed to be what I needed to be, I was told no this is not the way. Instead of just crying out to the Lord I shut down for a time. Again, I am sorry to say I have been in this mode a few times and I can trace a blockage that was not dealt with to interrupting the truth flow in my life of Christ's sustenance. Sometimes we need to clean out the arteries so the truth can come through. It is ok to spend some time in the quiet in seeking, you may be surprised what is shared. When waiting for answers we do not have to pressure ourselves to "do something" it is perfectly ok to simply wait on His voice.
 
The next concession stand confession is the person enjoying the game but being oblivious to what we are leaving behind for others to pick up (which we talked about can be false perceptions we exude when we operate out of the concession stand of life). We can become so accustomed to our ways that they feel so natural and we don't even know what we look like from the outside in. Just like the picture earlier, we can leave little trinkets behind that someone has to handle, pick up and throw away. Maybe it is a reaction we have to another person that is really our heart problem but we view it as "theirs" and we dump on someone with our tone, our harshness, our lack of care. Maybe it is our preoccupation with something important- that chokes the very life out of someone who could have or should have been number one. Is it perfectionism that saps life and tells lies about how things have to be. Is it anger that fuels messes everywhere we go and builds harshness around us in cycles passed on and on. Or could it be that little story we shared, it was meant in good humor, but the other person didn't see it that way. We break or we build. We go into the game of life but are we the winners or the sore losers.....that we do not see because we are too busy leaving messes for others. Been here too. The ugly spots, I recently called them my ugly feet. You see Christ before His death was anointed by Mary with expensive perfume that was estimated to cost $10,000, AKA the alabaster jar. The disciples saw waste- this could have been used to feed the poor or for some form of ministry. But Mary performed the highest form of ministry in anointing Christ in preparation for the burial they did not yet understand, but Christ did. Then Christ reciprocated the action accepting His preparation as the Son of God, yet now turning and washing His own disciples feet and wiping them with a towel tied around His waist. This ritual in bible times was provided to the guests of a meal as a sign of honor, the master of the house would have the servant wash the guests feet. I don't know about you but I would find myself pulling back my ugly feet from Christ if I was there, not my feet Lord, not in feet that walked on dusty roads all day and not even today not my feet...Peter missed it as well when Jesus replied, "if you do not let me wash your feet you will have no place with me", Peter's reply "wash my hands and head as well". Jesus reply, "those that have had a bath need only to wash their feet...He being Lord and Teacher became a servant of light and truth. He personified Joy. I had to search one time because I had read the Bible never said Jesus smiled but that He wept....but Jesus is joy, it is who He is. You cannot be the Way the Truth and the Life without joy....There is joy in the Lord after all.  Sometimes instead of a motion to motion we need to break down the details of why and be the ones to change our situation out of motions to intentions. I have found it is not as hard as I believed to fix the unfixable when my hope is set on Christ. It is easier to trust Christ with my ugly places now than it is for me to have to cry out for help when they have walked me to disastrous places. It is also easier to accept the identity that Christ gives us than to deny Him His evidence on the cross. First we saw we are member's of His body of which He is head, now we see we are cleaned in His honor and receive His love freely. Has He not ransomed enough, has He not already pursued me to the ends of the earth? He has nothing else to prove. We are wanted.
 
 
Or maybe you are the janitor in life. There will always be those that are superficial that we have to deal with, there will be those generously sharing their undesirables with us. You are getting it from all sides. Then the giant gust of mighty wind comes and blows it all to one corner of your life, go ahead take it all in...just look at the lovely view. Is this it? Really? I do not have the answers as to why some have so much to carry and others have less even season to season. But what I can tell you is when we see these people with too much we should take their hand and help them carry some of it, even if it is a small help. Jesus told us not to say "stay warm" when it is in our power to buy a coat. I am paraphrasing. If we are in a clean up season we must fight to stay encouraged and not lose heart, it is in this season I fear we may go from cleaning up to taking us shop behind the counter on our own terms. We must set times to free ourselves of the garbage and not let it become our color, clothing and character. We are not garbage. It sounds funny to say this but if we take it on even for a minute it will become a magnet for more. I am not saying bad stuff in life is always garbage, hard times are also useful for correction, training and refining. It is just when we get stuck in a mode where we feel this is all there is or that it fills us and we cannot breathe we have got to save ourselves from the lack of oxygen and take care to guard our hearts. Do something to stay on top even in prison at midnight mind you Paul and Silas sang hymns. When we can't see we must still sing. It is what comes next that shakes things up. A great earthquake shook the foundations of the prison, opened the doors and unfastened all the chains. Even in darkness Christ can make light and give joy. Some of my fondest memories of Christ have been in dark, dark times.
 
Christ is our all in all. Christ is the answer for all three perspectives His relationships with others show us how to live life well. He knew we would have something to overcome, He told us. We really are in faith school learning. The other day I was driving and stunned to a stop as I really heard a song that came on the radio. It amazes me that I can hear something 87 times and the 88th I actually "hear" it anew. Has that ever happened to you? So I heard, "there is only one way, one truth, one life" and it really hit me, shook me. One life. What am I missing, I have heard this verse I know the importance of one life in Christ, but this was different, there was a new door openening....one life. What if there is one way to go about life, one way to survive and make it in life.

My long-term boss recently retired where I work. It has been a very sad time yet exciting times as things change. Change is good but it stretches. You see I knew who I was at work, I knew who I was under my bosses leadership, not that I change now that he is gone but I feel I must "do over" as I am learning what my identity is in my new surroundings. When the surroundings change we must adapt to figure out what is safe, what is home, what end is up. I guess after a while my responses became automatic as I learned by boundaries and limits. In our own personal leadership abilities John Maxwell calls this "the law of the lid". This law describes the fact that we never exceed our own skills except by first improving our leadership abilities. My boss was an incredible leader, mentor and business man but he like us all had imperfections. God knows that change gets us uncomfortable which is good medicine because our "lids" of limits get challenged and we must again seek Christ for an answer to our identities which is what He lives to answer. He is asking us to remove our past lids, our expectations, our auto responses, our perceptions of people and their intentions....we are not to lid ourselves in. We were never meant to get stuck behind the counter in a dull, stuck hum drum survival game- we were meant to live with passion.
 
The Way, the Truth, and the Life John 14:12
11"Believe Me that I am in the Father and the Father is in Me; otherwise believe because of the works themselves. 12"Truly, truly, I say to you, he who believes in Me, the works that I do, he will do also; and greater works than these he will do; because I go to the Father. 13"Whatever you ask in My name, that will I do, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son.…
 
Christ said we could do greater things in Him....dare I even speak this without lightning striking me down...the Bible says it in .....Christ lived setting aside His deity and living as a follower just like us, showing us we can do the same- being empowered by the Holy Spirit. But we must CHOOSE to breathe Him in. This takes focusing on Christ and asking Him for life, ask Him about the One life....ask Him and He will show you the power of His life helping you come alive. Next if you feel like eternal clean up Cinderella of the universe, cry out....connect with Christ the man of sorrows- He will show you the freedom in sorrow, the actual joy in suffering, which comes from the blessing of closeness to Him in these times. He collects your tears in a bottle, whether you cry or stomp, thrash or fall apart He sees, cry out as David did in Psalms- shear emotion to Him who hears. Finally, if you are not sure if you are carrying or leaving garbage, ask. Ask Him who takes our weights, our sins, it all and He will reveal the path to removal. A good friend showed me that once we release our garbage to Him it is gone, as far as the east is from the west. We need not look for it again, the only finding of it we do is when the shadows come out and that is a shadow of it that comes from the pit of destruction, the father of lies...who seeks to deceive us. If we have truly given the sin over to Christ, take heart it is finished. His blood cost greatly and is no cheap substitute, such as the lies of the enemy to your soul are.

Finally, I leave you with some verses about service and a plot from a well known children's book turned movie, "Alice in Wonderland". The beginning of the movie shows Alice as she is faced with a major question, her hand in marriage. She says to her suitor in response to his question,"Well everyone expects me to, and you are a lord and I don't want to end up like (her single elderly crazy aunt) and I don't want to be a burden to mom. But I need some time." Then she runs off, falls in a rabbit hole joining Wonderland a land she named and visited as a child. It is not a dream it is a challenge. She is challenged on her identity, she has been told she must face an evil creature of the land of darkness alone. She feels a case of mistaken identity all along. Throughout her travels she grows tired of people telling her when and how and what to do till she decides on her own who she is and she faces the great black dragon like creature. She finds wonderland is a real place where she can be brave, courageous and take risks letting light win ultimately in the land through her standing. In the end she goes back to her "real" home in London to face the questions that need answers and she is able to answer all the silent opinions confidently. Why does it take the impossible to get us to believe we can answer and stand for ourselves in the simple demands of real life? In the words of Alice "I can defeat this dragon, I sometimes think of six impossible things before breakfast".
 
What do you believe is influencing your dreaming, living and service? 
 
If anyone speaks, they should do so as one who speaks the very words of God. If anyone serves, they should do so with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen.
 
 
You have made them to be a kingdom and priests to serve our God, and they will reign on the earth.”
 



























Monday, January 4, 2016

Broken Down

 
Here I am on the side of the road.
 
Waiting, watching.
 
Everyone speeding by, and yet here am I.
 
 
Remarkably peaceful in an eerie sort of way, being passed by that is.
 
Not sure I want the help that would stop for me anyway, so I will just stay here, broken down.
 
Funny, you hear that term "broke down" and you get comfortable with it, in it, it becomes you.
 
 
Roadside assistance plans are overrated, my vehicle is not equipped with that.
 
Plus I am out in the country, who gives roadside assistance out in the lost zone so late?
 
Trust me, right here I'll wait.
 
 
Is life passing me by, or are they all going too fast. Am I missing out, or are they missing out while being in?
 
 
I don't really care, all the questions used to matter more, before.
 
When I was in the race, headed somewhere.
 
 
I believe now there is a road to nowhere.
 
 
Purpose, it isn't overrated.
 
It keeps us out of the ditch, but even when we had it and when we thought we did...
 
It can all turn out the same, no stop for rest. An endless quest.
 
 
This quest it hurts, it gives joy. It pinches, it thrills. It gives new stops, new sights seen, new billboards and old. It gets tiring, it gets rejuvenating, times of warmth and cold.
 
 
Everything gets worked out on the road because it is always changing.
 
Except when you are broken down.
 
What 's new here?
You are left alone to deal with everything you may have been running from.
Faced with yourself and the review mirror.
 
 
No plans or worries, where to go from here, no destination is set.
I wish the Great Mechanic would pass by me and come to my rescue, the One whom I've never fully met.
 
I can picture it now, approaching from behind, a slow down and a pull over in front of my line of sight.
A reassuring vehicle I know, a trustworthy tow truck, a repair vehicle's lights.
 
 
Someone who knows what to do and what comes after the mend.
Gotta get a little greasy before things can get going again.
 
Hood is opened, analyzed and an assessment made.
 
Two questions?
 
Can it be fixed and what is the cost?
 
Maybe three, is it worth it?
 
Do I really want to go, anywhere.
I guess I have to, that is the flow of traffic anyway.
I don't care to be a part of the mad rush any day.
 
Stopped, things sunk in.
 
Where I thought I wanted to head was not in the right of Way and now I am here not wanting to go there or anywhere.
 
Got this far and it was a dead end, really glad I got stuck, broke down, with me, myself and I as well as my mind, not sure any of these in company are my friends.
 
Glad it happened here as a reality check.
You know, we wither away because of alone, or we crave alone until we face it.
Then we realize in selfishness we can't waste this.
 
We have been given a quiet while many don't receive a chance, a choice, a moment to reflect.
Their too busy with their wealth, friends, business, social face,
empire building and external upkeep race.
 
The One we did not know stopped for us as He stops for all.
He's waiting for us to decide if the cost is worth the ride.
 
It isn't a tow, get on board and move on. No, it is an expense we must cost.
 Giving up self direction, let a True Leader lead. Be open for inspection.
 
The good, the bad and ugly it all comes to Light.
Listen and be willing to admit our foolish plight.
 
Then the accepting of assistance and knowing we could never make it on our own.
Our broke down make and model was never ours, rent to own.
 
Till you receive the story of the Mechanic that knows one and all, you won't arrive. He'll gladly open His door step out and talk with you about all He sees. We must receive the advice, give up the drive and allow the leader to lead. He'll tell you where your going it just won't be as you think.
 
We've gotta acknowledge the Mechanic as good, let Him do His work and be open to His critique. Even His silence. I don't know about you but I've found my own way to a dead end, am I worried about following someone who knows the Way? No, regardless of how jaded we are there is a destiny. Maybe I am worried about staying the course. It is more than getting on the right road, setting cruise control and settling in.
 
The Mechanic knows the Way, He owns the vehicle, He cares for it and restores it. It is not boring, His way, He sets the optimum course. You won't be sorry, it isn't as you think. It is always good. We just need to be open to giving over control and trusting a Way that is not ours.
 
Glad your broke down my friend, your just what the mechanic wants to use, are you ready?
 
You can take the road to nowhere and find the narrow way worth following.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Wednesday, October 28, 2015

Home

 

If you are a mom or know one you probably have heard yourself or one saying such phrases: "Why is the floor sticky, Momma needs a helper, I need someone to take out the recycling, someone to take out the garbage and why is the floor sticky!". Other popular phrases are: I have told you 1,000 times not too do that, eat with your face over the plate, your pants are not a napkin, who took this out and didn't put it away, I just cleaned that, were you born in a barn, don't forget to scrub feet/face/hands, did you hear me...and I am sure there are many, many more go to statements we mommas use to get our point across.

I was nicely requesting help today after making a large breakfast for my family (I say requesting because I found myself saying the phrases above momma needs...except all of them right in a row just as typed). You see, I had spent the previous day sweeping, scrubbing a floor via good ole fashioned hand and knee scrubbing, scrubbing the bathroom floor the same way, washing clothes- folding and putting away and any other mom related tasks that came up. So I had big intentions, still after being a mom for 18 years, you would think I would have learned by now. But no, I still had big intentions... you know the dream; that once a mom cleans it should stay that way...did I mention I have 3 boys and 2 animals and a husband? So back to my dream, couldn't the house stay clean just for one whole day? No, it won't no matter what tricks I have tried it never stays, I know now this is just a sign of good living and I have had choices over the years; laugh at it or get mad. Why, because a full home is the sign of a happy home, gratitude is more than dirt deep after all.

My husband ended up ending my sentence and I found myself laughing. So after my "the floor is sticky, momma needs a helper, I need someone to take out the recycling, someone to take out the garbage and why is the floor sticky!" My husband gently and humorously added "and someone to get out of my way". He gets me. Some days I struggle with what I really want, do I want you out of my way, do I want you to stop dipping your hands into the food on the stove or oven and testing it and just sit down, or do I want you to help me cook. Do I want you to help with the laundry or might I worry you will screw it up so I will just do it myself. Do I want some support and someone to talk to or do I want to be alone. I don't even know sometimes...it must be hard to live with me, at times a greater percentage than I can realize I am sure! Maybe it is just me that is torn at times with what I want...it depends on the day and honestly my level of anxiety about getting things done or the level of perfection I place on myself and others, then once the things on my "list" are done I would like them to stay done. Hmmmmm, not too much to ask is it? I have found my anxiety is directly influenced by my time spent focusing in on the problems or worse yet the "probability that a problem may occur".

When you can laugh and look around at the perspective of things anxiety has a funny was of dissipating...yes, we are raising a new generation, the next leaders or followers. We are either loving our husbands or becoming the living flesh of the bible verse about the nagging wife...you know the one that says it is better to live on the roof of the house than with a nagging wife, sigh (Proverbs 21:9). My family doesn't need to hear bitterness.

Truly this time I did request help very nicely I was a bit proud of myself for once, but it helped me to see the bigger picture of the home and what my part is, rather, what standard my habits paint for my family. My family and my Lord could care less if the rushing around gets the "sticky gone" in my home and it miraculously stays gone. Jesus didn't walk around delivering housewives from "sticky", Martha wasn't healed from sticky floors but she was asked to be more like Mary who was sitting at Jesus feet whether on a sticky floor or not! 
 
That day I found myself nervously watching the floor as plates flew, syrup bottles moved faster than rush hour traffic, kids ate as they ran around, conversation went on as I was still at the stove preparing and serving...all this hectic-ness and my heart was trying to get a few moments to sit with my family and enjoy some time with them. But still nervously watching the floor with syrup and hash browns already decorating it...my husbands side of the table lovingly dotted with syrup already as my blood curdled as he said "whoops"...

I decided to let it all go when my husband said what he said...really, I had company and I was not alone and that is truly what my heart wants. Home is being filled with light and goodness. Home is about who is there. Is Jesus present? If Jesus were present at my home, would the conversation at the table keep my eyes on the scraps falling, syrup dripping or on the amazing conversation with the King. My job in Christ is to treat my family the way Christ honors me, giving others the attention and patience they each deserve. Each day I have a chance to send my family to the roof or draw them to conversations with the King.  I will chose sticky joy over sticky anxiety anytime....but I need to pay attention to where my attention goes. I can be present and not home, not filled with Christ's goodness or I can be present and lit up with the moment, living in it and not around it. What am I stuck on...as annoying as it is to clean up the entire household and find that one spot with your sock after everything was put in order and you tried so hard to assure it stays that way...it is beyond our control and instead shouldn't we fight for sticky joy? I am going to fight to keep joy stuck to my heart and mind and not allow it scrubbed off in my battles. Fight to remember to look for moments and not at my agendas...after all the lights are on and I want to be here.

I would love to hear your comments on what phrases you have said to your family!

Sunday, October 18, 2015

Not my sight but your sight be won!


I was on a drive today realizing I need to quit losing. I need to quit losing my vision by my own limitations. You've heard the sound biblical advice "not my will but yours be done", well let's also say it is just as applicable to say "not my sight but yours be won" in my life. I need to stop seeing things so differently than you see them, Lord. I need to see heaven on earth and be aware of your heart.  There are those in this life that have the eyeglasses of heaven or if you prefer contacts, then they can have the contacts of heaven (no, this kind do not pop out and you have to dig one out of the questionably clean sink and ponder if it is a good idea to put it back in---where?). Those that have this heaven vision shine it in their writing, in their choices, in their faces, they act different, they sound different. When they do something it is new. When they say something it makes you stop and listen. They have wisdom and counsel as if they are learning right from heaven's teaching. Why do we think this is not possible for all? It is attainable depending on what our "seekers seek".

For me to become a seeker of sight, I need to let go of anxiety and the need to be in control.

There was a book written in the 1960's about two social groups and their status, do remember it? Both cliques were at odds with each other over their perceived status. Both groups had their turf and their status and both were trying to figure out who they really were. There is one character who was different and tried to help both sides and be fair to both. She was even misunderstood but her intent was genuine. This story could probably be written about many high schools across the ages and the country, however.

What if we forgot about these unwritten social rules and just were free to be? Why do we have to have such an "outside dominant" focus anyway? What is real and what is truth, who knows unless we act real. Our vision get's muddled by slop on our windshields. Like the poor soul walking in some really nice clean outfit and a truck powers by hitting a mud puddle spraying the poor one completely from head to toe...life dictates to us how we should be in much the same way. This slopping effect in life "teaches" us not to do_____ anymore, not to wear_____ anymore, not to _____...you name it, we are encouraged negatively by others just as we are positively supported. Some teaching by group is good; we learn that our friends are not always right. We learn not to eat with our mouths open, we learn that gossip keeps us from being trusted, but we can also learn how to hide the genuine out of exclusion or fear and lack of acceptance.

What rubs off from others can build us up with new skills, encouragement and knowledge but it also has the potential to undo the best of us if we let it in a negative sense become a measuring bar.

Many are the punishments and tactics charged of us for not fitting into the mold, that was meant to be broken.

If the rules are unwritten and not "golden" maybe they were meant to be broken.

What I mean by the above is that people are meant for people, we are meant to help each other, lift each other, two are better than one because they can keep warm, catch each other when they fall and fight back to back against adversaries. However, if the influence is not genuine what rubs off can remove what is good in us, it can shut down the good in us meant to be uncovered. There is a cost and a punishment some groups of people or persons dish out if we try to be ourselves, whether teasing, holding back some treatment, words or thing to influence something from within us. This kind of behavior comes from weakness and not strength and these people are not being genuine. The golden rule is to treat others as we would want to be treated, if a rule or standard someone is holding you to or judging you by is not of life importance, a value or a biblical truth it probably is not worth worrying about. For example, in my high school certain brand names were the rule, if you didn't wear them you were not "in". Who cares, I don't see their status better off now for the jeans they wore then...it didn't carry them anywhere better now.

But when we learn to somehow measure ourselves by what "they" say, think or believe and we start to make little neat piles arranged for others and not ourselves, that becomes a problem. When we cannot remember what we love, that becomes the problem. When we are so lost within ourselves that we forget reasons, that becomes the problem. We cannot believe lies. We were meant to excel in truth. We were created to be real and be unique. Cookie cutters are not unique. Gingerbread men are all baked at 350 for 10-12 min. and they get frosted and end with the same fate, getting ingested. We are not cookie cutter people. Why is it some in the "limelight" do something crazy different and it is the acceptable but in small town USA someone tried to be themselves and they are made fun of, tormented in their own minds for not measuring up or even cast away?

The first time I heard Jesus died for the likes of me I was one confused girl who was in hiding and not wanting to be found. Please know if you are reading this and feeling stuck in a one size, cookie cutter world- that was not the Creators intent. You were created to be uniquely you, one of a kind, worth dying for. Yes, the Creator sent His one and only son so you might live and live abundantly. This I have seen with my own eyes and it is truth. Chains are broken in Christ if we trust Him and ask Him for His life and His eyes...this vision He has which is beautiful, amazing and worth waiting and living for is available for everyone.

If you would like, pray this prayer with me:

Lord,

My life feels dry like leaves scattered everywhere...there are always reminders swirling around me that make me feel brittle, I am reminded of my failures, my limitations and my hindrances. However, I hear that you want more for me. I can believe with my mind and heart that you are different and you are not like this world and it's works. I submit my life to you and your ways, to your creative power and Holy Spirit. Lord, take my life and blow it all apart! Take the dry places and remove them in your majestic power. I confess I will stop the work of my arranging and striving to make something out of what I have and I chose to surrender it all; good, bad and beautiful to you. You can make me whole, You can restore the truth. Take all the negative words spoken to me and blow them away in your truth, take all the negative deeds done to me and mightily strike them down in your breath, speak your beautiful words of adoration so I can hear them, let me accept the gift of your life given for me. Take what I see and remove the pieces so that I see heavens view on earth as you see it. Let me stop judging myself and submit my heart to your processes. After all I can never measure up but I can trust you, and I simply gain your acceptance by believing in you, (not by doing or being anything more than what I am right this second). Lord your promises are true and I choose to lean on them and not my own understanding. Take what I have known apart and rebuild me according to the beauty you promise, I choose to believe.


Amen.

If you prayed this prayer feel free to comment.

Saturday, July 4, 2015

Draft Mode

What keeps a person from being truly effective?


If there be any searching, wondering, questioning even doubting about the point of the life one has been given...that in itself ultimately keeps one from being truly effective. But the question began with a wondering a searching and yet it ends in being only more ineffective. So what is the answer?

To find an answer we must become acquainted with the root:

What are the causes of becoming stuck in life?

Many are the causes: becoming overwhelmed with life, having questions, doubts, let downs, even in the midst of great success one can become stuck. So you need not have anything in particular to be left questioning and feeling nothing.

Ask yourself where does it unravel for you, what are the very questions that leave you stuck and as King Solomon so best said feeling, "meaningless, meaningless, everything is meaningless a chasing after the wind".

Once you know the question you are stuck on or the answer perhaps then you can move forward.

What can you do about it, there may not be a specialist, there need not be, perhaps you were placed on this earth to be the answer or shed some light in a dark place.

If you are still stuck on the above statement, who says that you cannot be a source for an answer...a lot of times we search because there is no good answer observed in our lives and we are in a desert place longing for one...so this is where action requires courage. Boldness to stand in strength when we are all but worn down, to be the answer we desire.

When we draft our lives- in our minds, on paper, daydreaming per say, we are not accomplishing what God has called us to- obedience is action and living out our faith. Look at this scripture written from an elder to a noble woman of faith:




2 John 1 New International Version (NIV)
The elder,
To the lady chosen by God and to her children, whom I love in the truth—and not I only, but also all who know the truth because of the truth, which lives in us and will be with us forever:
Grace, mercy and peace from God the Father and from Jesus Christ, the Father’s Son, will be with us in truth and love.
It has given me great joy to find some of your children walking in the truth, just as the Father commanded us. And now, dear lady, I am not writing you a new command but one we have had from the beginning. I ask that we love one another. And this is love: that we walk in obedience to his commands. As you have heard from the beginning, his command is that you walk in love.
I say this because many deceivers, who do not acknowledge Jesus Christ as coming in the flesh, have gone out into the world. Any such person is the deceiver and the antichrist. Watch out that you do not lose what we[a] have worked for, but that you may be rewarded fully. Anyone who runs ahead and does not continue in the teaching of Christ does not have God; whoever continues in the teaching has both the Father and the Son. 10 If anyone comes to you and does not bring this teaching, do not take them into your house or welcome them. 11 Anyone who welcomes them shares in their wicked work.
12 I have much to write to you, but I do not want to use paper and ink. Instead, I hope to visit you and talk with you face to face, so that our joy may be complete.
13 The children of your sister, who is chosen by God, send their greetings.
 
Matthew Henry's commentary:
And we may further see that it is joyful to good old ministers, and accordingly to other good old disciples, to see a hopeful rising generation, who may serve God and support religion in the world when they are dead and gone. We see here also the rule of true walking: the commandment of the Father. Then is our walk true, our converse right, when it is managed by the word of God.
 
I am not saying we shouldn't be allowed times of hurt, questioning and wanting more of an answer as to why we are alive...I think we must long and question in order to be motivated argue with the sense of entitlement to get answers and turn instead to give answers. I think the questions are where great things begin, the questions like a landslide give way to faith that then quantifies action through obedience to Christ and His mission, His reason for being in and through you.
 
The story above is a beautiful picture of a woman who some sources speculate was a widowed woman since she is noted as the head of the home. Her children are following Lord. Wait, back up, it didn't say "all her children" in verse four it said "some of her children". Wow, a faithful noble woman who has experienced possible tragic loss of proportions now doing the work of mothering alone- commended by a leader of faith for "some" success. Isn't that interesting. We do not and cannot, as mom's and dad's, control the choices of our family members, but we can obey and give a very strong start and possibility for success in their lives.
 
Love, it is a tangible and meaningful picture acknowledged through our faithful obedience, even if what we produce is not a perfect score.
 
How much do you bet that mom does not credit herself for her "some" but her heart is on the others maybe only one that is not following the Lord. Don't you know her heart, I'd gather to wage this mom does not credit any success to herself as she considers the "some" that are not walking rightly. But God doesn't demand perfection, and this mom may be at the place some of us are today- she may have been full of questions and wondering why she had to lose her husband, why she had to walk this faith walk alone, why she had to endure who know what ridicule in her city as a widower- maybe even some mocking her, maybe her prodigal had a bad name in town even (my heart hurts over her questions).  I love that Jesus sends her a letter through this elder, a leader, telling her she has done well, telling her she is noble.
 
Encouragement, if you have not heard today from anyone- this may be your divine appointment to hear that God sees the good you are doing. Be encouraged, He does not demand perfection for He sees the heart.
 
The elder tells this woman to continue on in love, not to get ahead of God and therefore get deceived in the process. Some teachers tell a good story but if their words have no Christ in them we are to be aware, taking them in may be taking down our own walk. There is not a bigger or better thing than Christ. As much as our fast paced, gimmick based world wants us to believe the answer is here or there...no, the answer is in continuing in the faith even when it doesn't seem it is heading anywhere.
 
Faith is painted on human hearts and overflows. If you are stuck in draft mode as I have been, the issue may be questions but that is not where we are to remain. We are to live out loud in our relationships, even the broken ones, we are to move in our God given strengths and share. We are as Matthew Henry's commentary states, to allow God to manage our lives through His word.
 
Can't you appreciate how the elder speaks to the woman in writing but then closes saying, "he has more to say to her but he wants to see her face to face, so that their joy may be complete". There is something to living out "in person" with others and leading out loud from the depths of questions, that is where Christ moves and we stay in step with Him. I encourage you to find someone face to face and encourage them in Christ or continue this walk in faith allowing God to manage your life through the Word, to remove all of the questions and turn them into service for others.
 
 
 
Where there were questions many times in the Word Jesus answered with more questions, I encourage you to check out the blog post below and ask yourself these questions Jesus asked.